Good-bye my sweet puppy

September 18th is a day I'll never forget. The day I knew would someday come, sooner or later, but I was hoping much later. You try to prepare yourself for days like the 18th, and even though you are receiving countless signs that the day is near, you just hope deep down, that it will never come. Almost 14 years ago my "first born" came into our lives, weighing a mere 3.5 pounds. He was my first dog on my own...our first dog as a couple. He really was our first child. He was sooooo spoiled. From day one, he stole my heart and he followed me wherever I went......for 14 years. At times it annoyed me, especially with 2 kids, I couldn't even go to the bathroom by myself, Spanky was always right there. He's always followed me room to room, and always sat by me. For all those years, he slept right by my legs in bed too......but now he's gone. He used to "talk" to us by making a whimper sound and sometimes that would get on your nerves, now I would do anything to hear that sound. My heart aches for him. As Chase said, "the house seems so empty without him here". That is so true. After 14 years of him being right there by my feet at every step...there's just emptiness. The house just seems so different without him here. I know it will get easier as time passes,but now it hurts. To those of you who don't understand all this greif over a dog, I tell you...it's so hard because Spanky was so many things to me. My sweet puppy who use to love to play tug of war with his towel, who used to "suckle" his blankie up until just a few months ago, when he was resting beside me on the couch or bed. He loved to go for car rides. He thought he was part cat, and use to lye on the upper cushions of the couch. In our first house, we had a bay window that he would lye in all day while we were at work, so he could look out the window and wait for us to return. He could give "five" and speak, and lye down when told. When the kids were babies, he was very protective of them. He always lied in bed with me when I was sick or if i worked nights, he slept with me the next day. He would lick me when I cried, or if I had a cut. He was there when I had a bad day and even when I yelled at him, stayed right by me. I love Spanky and will never forget him and will always love him and miss him. It hurts to know he will never again be at my feet or by my legs while sleeping. I hope and pray, that he had a good life with me. I hope he knew how much I loved him and how much I will miss him. September 18th was one of the hardest days of my life...... it is the day I chose to put an end to another living things life, and I pray, it was the right decision. I know in my heart that it was, but I wasn't ready.....to let go and I want him back. I hope and pray that dogs do go to heaven, and that he is lying at the feet of Jesus now, instead of mine. I love you Spanky. There will never be a dog like you in my life, you were so special and I'm thankful I had you for so many years.